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Longform Stories

The Crossword, May 25: Astrobiology (Themeless)

1d ago·1 min read·182 words

It’s All About Victor Wembanyama

1d ago·1 min read·170 words

The Avalanche’s Season Hinges On Cale Makar’s Busted Shoulder

2d ago·2 min read·240 words

Shocker: Jaxson Dart Is A Trump Guy

2d ago·2 min read·251 words

Nikolaj Ehlers Rewrote The Hurricanes’ Old Script

2d ago·2 min read·394 words

The Knicks Have All The Juice

2d ago·2 min read·322 words

Hey! Over Here! Come Chat With The Defector Staff

4d ago·1 min read·62 words

The Cavs Created The Conditions For A Josh Hart Game

4d ago·3 min read·471 words

How The U.S. Military Rots American Masculinity

4d ago·2 min read·254 words

Foolish Humans! Gulls Are Not So Gullible After All

4d ago·2 min read·247 words

Back-To-Back Blown Leads, With Noah Kulwin Of ‘Blowback’

4d ago·1 min read·120 words

What If The Canadiens Are Just This Good?

4d ago·1 min read·193 words

Oh No! Outfielders Have Forgotten How To Play Defense!

4d ago·1 min read·199 words

The Tampa Bay Rays Are Still Flourishing, And Still Invisible

4d ago·2 min read·390 words

You Don’t Know Alysa Liu’s Power Until You See It In Person

4d ago·3 min read·430 words

The Dallas Wings Can Find A Bucket Anywhere

4d ago·2 min read·304 words

Song Of The Puzzlesmith, With Ian Livengood

4d ago·2 min read·303 words

The Montreal Victoire Make A Living As Champions

5d ago·1 min read·155 words

‘Blue Heron’ Is A Revelation

5d ago·2 min read·332 words

Mitch Marner Needed To Get Out Of Toronto

5d ago·1 min read·184 words

The ‘Survivor 50’ Finale Was A Dark Omen For The Future

5d ago·3 min read·543 words

How Do We Decide To Have A Baby If We’re On The Fence?

5d ago·1 min read·57 words

The Passion Of The Drake: A (Mostly) Objective Review Of His Three New Albums

5d ago·2 min read·202 words

You Do Not Have To Hand It To Oklahoma City, And By “It” I Mean The Basketball

5d ago·2 min read·253 words

Kill Grogu

5d ago·1 min read·187 words

Tom Brady: The Leather Years

6d ago·3 min read·451 words

Daniel Radcliffe Will Talk You Off The Ledge

6d ago·3 min read·511 words

Winning Justifies Itself

6d ago·2 min read·308 words

What The Fuck Is Happening With This Fish

6d ago·2 min read·279 words

And So We Arrive, Starving And Exhausted, At The Defector ‘Survivor 50’ Finale Questionnaire

6d ago·2 min read·382 words

Wasia Can Be A Lot. It’s Fine.

6d ago·2 min read·370 words

Wow! America’s Graduating Seniors Really Fucking Hate AI!

6d ago·1 min read·175 words

The Knicks Made A Delicious Meal Out Of James Harden

6d ago·1 min read·144 words

Free, Easy, Dead: The Difficult Birth And Predictable Death Of IRS Direct File

6d ago·2 min read·266 words

Saints Frog-Marched Out Of Playoff Final As Punishment For Spying

6d ago·2 min read·234 words

How To Eat A Pop-Tart Correctly

May 19·1 min read·56 words

The Written Word Is Having A Rough Week

May 19·2 min read·293 words

Jakub Dobes Is Growing Up

May 19·1 min read·104 words

Dylan Harper Demands Your Attention

May 19·2 min read·267 words

How To Dress To Change Your Life

May 19·2 min read·319 words

Eurovision Is Running Out Of Time

May 19·2 min read·340 words

Who Can Keep Up With Chennedy Carter?

May 19·2 min read·251 words

My God, Victor Wembanyama

May 19·2 min read·281 words

The Canadiens Must Be Blessed

May 19·1 min read·135 words

Oklahoma Newspaper Deletes Column Comparing Thunder To Israel

May 18·2 min read·246 words

Ronda Rousey And Gina Carano Deliver Shittiest Women’s MMA Fight In History

May 18·1 min read·102 words

Donald Trump Is Stealing Your Money

May 18·2 min read·367 words

Who Will Beat Jannik Sinner?

May 18·3 min read·423 words

White Genocide Conspiracy Freaks Flee Nationals Game After Banner Stunt

May 18·2 min read·237 words

The Crossword, May 18: One In A Million

May 18·1 min read·165 words

New Blazers Owner Tom Dundon Not Exactly Inspiring Confidence

May 18·2 min read·293 words

Five Years After Peyton Ham’s Killing, Lawsuit Against State Trooper Who Shot Him Lives On

May 18·1 min read·70 words

The Pistons Did Everything Wrong

May 18·2 min read·317 words

Shohei Ohtani Adds “Little League Home Run” To His Résumé

May 17·2 min read·249 words

Jonas Vingegaard And The Impossible Standard

May 17·2 min read·282 words

These NBA Playoffs Have Been Fantastic

May 17·1 min read·168 words

Defector Numbers Guy Sean Kuhn Called Up To Big Leagues

May 15·1 min read·65 words

Would You Want This Guy As Your Dentist?

May 15·2 min read·363 words

Consider The Sister

May 15·1 min read·147 words

Tony Dokoupil Flew 8,000 Miles Just To Eat More Shit

May 15·2 min read·255 words

The “Too Large” Gesture, With Patrick Redford

May 14·1 min read·187 words

Mark Vientos Just Kind Of Falling Down Tells The Story Of The Mets’ Season

May 14·3 min read·454 words

Even A Bad Valkyries Game Is A Pretty Great Time

May 14·2 min read·236 words

We Have A Gorilla Trade

May 14·1 min read·147 words

The Pistons Had Their Chances

May 14·2 min read·387 words

‘The Sheep Detectives’ Made Me Baaaawl My Eyes Out

May 14·3 min read·409 words

Patrick Radden Keefe’s ‘London Falling’ Tries To Separate Fact From Fiction

May 14·3 min read·551 words

The Saddest Place In America Is Wherever The Washington Post Films This Podcast

May 14·2 min read·246 words

Who’s Stopping These Avs?

May 14·1 min read·138 words

Five Nights With The Montreal Victoire, Who Dragged Me To Hockey Heaven

May 13·1 min read·12 words

Jason Collins Got To Tell His Own Story

May 13·1 min read·8 words

Southampton In Hot Water Over World’s Most Conspicuous Spygate

May 13·1 min read·9 words

How Do I Get My Picky Eater Off A Chicken Nugget-Based Diet?

May 13·1 min read·12 words

Tiger Woods’s Prescription Records Will Be Shielded From The Public

May 13·1 min read·10 words

Steelers, Longing For A Quiet Death, Willing To Wait For Aaron Rodgers

May 13·1 min read·12 words

The Giants Will No Longer Be Pummeling Each Other With Their Crotches

May 13·1 min read·12 words

Brandon Clarke Found Dead In California

May 13·1 min read·6 words

Victor Wembanyama Must Be Seen To Be Believed

May 13·1 min read·8 words

Fuck Touchscreens

May 12·1 min read·2 words

Lane Kiffin’s Decision To Abandon Ole Miss Was Actually Smart And Good, According To Lane Kiffin

May 12·1 min read·16 words

Heaven Help Us, The Thunder Have Yet Another Dude

May 12·1 min read·9 words

What Are You Doing In There, Fish?

May 12·1 min read·7 words

The Devil Wears Prada, Too

May 12·1 min read·5 words

When Team USA Needed To Get World Cup Ready, It Needed Boraball

May 12·1 min read·12 words

Cameron Brink Is All Tangled Up

May 12·1 min read·6 words

The Father Who Stepped Back, With Tom Krell

May 12·1 min read·8 words

Can The Jumper Be Hacked? Inside Basketball’s Next Arms Race

May 12·1 min read·10 words

“Big Dumper” Now Apt For More Depressing Reason

May 11·1 min read·8 words

Bum-Ass Franchise Wins Last-Ditch Pot Of Gold After Years Of Self-Exile

May 11·1 min read·11 words

The Montreal Crowd Claimed A Victory

May 11·1 min read·6 words

The Claude Delusion

May 11·1 min read·3 words

The Crossword, May 11: She’s A Rainbow

May 11·1 min read·7 words

Longtime NBA Photographer Nathaniel S. Butler Explains How He Sees Basketball

May 11·1 min read·11 words

Philadelphia Continues To Innovate In The Field Of Losing

May 11·1 min read·9 words

Steve Kerr Hasn’t Had Enough Just Yet

May 11·1 min read·7 words

The Timberwolves Were Elbowed And Kicked Back Into The Series

May 11·1 min read·10 words

Jeff Probst Is Ruining ‘Survivor 50’

May 10·1 min read·6 words

Finally, An Austen-ish Adaptation Worth Watching

May 10·1 min read·6 words

Pastor Clarifies That Giant, Shiny Trump Statue Worshippers Love Is NOT An Idol

May 10·1 min read·13 words

Fabio Wardley Was Too Brave For His Own Good

May 10·1 min read·9 words

You Are Hereby Invited To Join The Universal Baseball Association

May 8·1 min read·10 words

Role Players, Ring Chasers, And A Shadow GM: Your Guide To The 2026 WNBA Season

May 8·1 min read·15 words

James Harden Is Powering Down

May 8·1 min read·5 words

The ONLY Thing More BROKEN Than Real Madrid’s TEAM SPIRIT Is News Aggregators’ CAPS LOCK BUTTON

May 8·1 min read·16 words

How One Ohio High School Built An Unlikely Gymnastics Dynasty

May 8·1 min read·10 words

Gianni Infantino: We’re Just Here To Extract Wealth From You American Hogs

May 8·1 min read·12 words

Franco Berardi’s ‘Thinking Gaza’ Fails To Think

May 8·1 min read·7 words

Gritty Is Beside Himself, With Lauren Theisen

May 7·1 min read·7 words

Dylan Harper Is Ready For The Moment

May 7·1 min read·7 words

World Cup Tallies Another Human Rights Abuse

May 7·1 min read·7 words

What Makes A Great American Songwriter?

May 7·1 min read·6 words

Even In The Movies, Journalism Is Fucked

May 7·1 min read·7 words

Report: Mike Vrabel And Dianna Russini Went Boat Mode

May 7·1 min read·9 words

The American League Is Putting The Mid In Middling

May 7·1 min read·9 words

How Do I Manage My Newborn’s Life If Planning Things Stresses Me Out?

May 6·1 min read·13 words

Arsenal Can Almost Taste The Glory

May 6·1 min read·6 words

We Can’t Grow The Game Like This, With Danny Of Who’s Next

May 6·1 min read·12 words

José Altuve Takes Mighty Rip At Pitch That Would Have Knocked A Lefty Batter’s Shoes Off

May 6·1 min read·16 words

Stefon Diggs Found Not Guilty Of Attacking Private Chef

May 6·1 min read·9 words

It’s A Strange Time To Be A LIV Golf Fella

May 6·1 min read·10 words

The Colorado Avalanche Don’t Need Luck

May 6·1 min read·6 words

Lesbians And Legalized Gambling Are Vying To Save The American Sports Bar

May 6·1 min read·12 words

The Leafs Fell Ass-Backward Into Gavin McKenna

May 6·1 min read·7 words

The Pistons Are Getting Down To Business

May 6·1 min read·7 words

You Should Never Be The Most Sycophantic Participant In A Conversation With A Chatbot

May 5·1 min read·14 words

Could This Finally Be The Hurricanes’ Year?

May 5·1 min read·7 words

Everyone Is Already Mad At The New GM Of The Toronto Maple Leafs

May 5·1 min read·13 words

The Musical Biopic Is Dead

May 5·1 min read·5 words

Jules Boykoff’s ‘Kicking’ Is Clear-Eyed And Warm-Hearted

May 5·1 min read·7 words

The Minnesota Timberwolves Cannot Be Doubted

May 5·1 min read·6 words

Jaylen Brown Follows Up Playoff Collapse With Streamer Tantrum

May 4·1 min read·9 words

Cherubic Formula 1 Child Continues Success In Miami

May 4·1 min read·8 words

Manchester United Is Reaching Dangerous Levels Of Normal

May 4·1 min read·8 words

You’re Not Looking Through 12,000 New Artemis Photos, So Here Are Some Of The Best

May 4·1 min read·15 words

What The Hell Was That?

May 4·1 min read·5 words

The Crossword, May 4: Fire Away

May 4·1 min read·6 words

Tampa Lost An Unlosable Game

May 4·1 min read·5 words

The Canadiens Butted Their Way Into An Upset

May 4·1 min read·8 words

Fraud Allegations Against Pistons Dismissed

May 4·1 min read·5 words

It’s Ildemaro Vargas Time In Major League Baseball

May 3·1 min read·8 words

The San Francisco Giants Have Never Cast A Smaller Shadow

May 3·1 min read·10 words

The Hurricanes Aim To Keep It Boring

May 3·1 min read·7 words

The Sixers And Flyers Claim Home Court Over Bruce Springsteen

May 3·1 min read·10 words

The Nuggets Went Out Like Suckers

May 1·1 min read·6 words

Watch Out For Those Fees

May 1·1 min read·5 words

Two Walk-Off Wins? In This Economy?

May 1·1 min read·6 words

Make It Nice: How To Organize A Home Office

May 1·1 min read·9 words

Want To Buy A Car? Be Ready To Suffer

May 1·1 min read·9 words

There’s Never A Bad Time To Gawk At Young Shaq Highlights

May 1·1 min read·11 words

Sheesh!

May 1·1 min read·1 words

Duck, Duck, Goals!

May 1·1 min read·3 words

Everything OK Over There, Mitchell Robinson?

Apr 30·1 min read·6 words

Figure Skater Who Reported Sexual Assault Comes Forward

Apr 30·1 min read·8 words

Getting Kicked In The Back By P.J. Brown

Apr 30·1 min read·8 words

The Torpor Of ‘Converts’

Apr 30·1 min read·4 words

Vegas And Utah Are Murder On Early Bedtimes

Apr 30·1 min read·8 words

Saudi Arabia Decides LIV Golf Is Ready To Be Supported By Its Passionate Fan Base, Unbeatable Product

Apr 30·1 min read·17 words

The NBA’s Lottery Reform Proposal Will Change, But Not Eliminate, Tanking

Apr 30·1 min read·11 words

These Canadiens Will Not Be Pushed Around

Apr 30·1 min read·7 words

Let Pluto Rest In Dwarf Planet Peace

Apr 30·1 min read·7 words

Charli XCX Is Firmly In Her Cinephile Era

Apr 30·1 min read·8 words

The Angels Might Just Have A Dude In Jose Soriano

Apr 29·1 min read·10 words

How Can I Resolve Conflicts Between My Younger Kid And His Older Brother?

Apr 29·1 min read·13 words

Prosecutors Got A Guilty Plea In The NBA Gambling Case

Apr 29·1 min read·10 words

Breaking Down The NBA’s Injury And Jeffrey Epstein Issues, With Henry Abbott

Apr 29·1 min read·12 words

Joel Embiid Stuns In New Upright Look

Apr 29·1 min read·7 words

PSG-Bayern Was Everything Soccer Can And Should Be

Apr 29·1 min read·8 words

Who Actually Wants A Bigger NCAA Tournament?

Apr 29·1 min read·7 words

They Don’t Call Him Jesper Sievestedt

Apr 29·1 min read·6 words

The Biggest Tournament In Collegiate Table Tennis Is Underdog Utopia

Apr 29·1 min read·10 words

I Have No Pages

Apr 28·1 min read·4 words

That’s A Fair Ball, Believe It Or Not

Apr 28·1 min read·8 words

The Magic Are Winning The Beef War

Apr 28·1 min read·7 words

‘Michael’ Is The Most Cynical Attempt At Biopic Myth-Making Yet

Apr 28·1 min read·10 words

Texas Tech Transfer QB Brendan Sorsby Leaves School, Enters Gambling Rehab

Apr 28·1 min read·11 words

One Of The NBA’s Most Important Jobs May Be Headed Toward A Crisis

Apr 28·1 min read·13 words

It’s Almost Time For MLB’s Underachievers To Rearrange Some Deck Chairs

Apr 27·1 min read·11 words

The Red Sox Can’t Even Clean House With Dignity

Apr 27·1 min read·9 words

De’Aaron Fox Makes The Game Fun For The Spurs

Apr 27·1 min read·9 words

The Oilers, As Usual, Have Bigger Problems

Apr 27·1 min read·7 words

Rockets Put Selves In Fine Position For Gentleman’s Sweep

Apr 27·1 min read·9 words

The Crossword, April 27: You Lose (Themeless)

Apr 27·1 min read·7 words

Gwendoline Riley’s Phantom Lives

Apr 27·1 min read·4 words

How Much Good Can A Green Clay Tennis Court Do?

Apr 27·1 min read·10 words

Jazz Chisholm Is So Bad At ABS Challenges

Apr 27·1 min read·8 words

Report: Victor Wembanyama Cleared To Play Game 4

Apr 26·1 min read·8 words

Everyone Survives White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner

Apr 26·1 min read·7 words

Is Magic-Pistons The Most Interesting Series So Far?

Apr 26·1 min read·8 words

Ayo Dosunmu Had Himself A Game

Apr 26·1 min read·6 words

Don’t Make The Tiny Man Dribble While Everyone Else Stands Still

Apr 24·1 min read·11 words

Tony Dokoupil Is Still Eating Shit, Even If No One’s Watching

Apr 24·1 min read·11 words

How Close To The Stanford Prison Experiment Can A Reality Show Get?

Apr 24·1 min read·12 words

Jaden McDaniels Will Fight You Every Step Of The Way

Apr 24·1 min read·10 words

Lena Dunham Can’t Help Herself

Apr 24·1 min read·5 words

What’s Parenting Lily Yohannes Like? An Interview With Her Dad

Apr 24·1 min read·10 words

‘The Rockford Files’ Remains One Of Television’s Greatest Hangs

Apr 24·1 min read·9 words

Making Noises At Jim Nantz, With Aaron Schatz

Apr 23·1 min read·8 words

The NFL May Be Biting Off More Than It Can Chew

Apr 23·1 min read·11 words

A Rob Schneider Comedy Show May Be Long And Expensive, But At Least It’s Boring

Apr 23·1 min read·15 words

All That Matters Is That It Bangs

Apr 23·1 min read·7 words

Bonk! This Ball Went Somewhere New!

Apr 23·1 min read·6 words

One Night At Formula 1’s Drunk-Driving Simulator

Apr 23·1 min read·7 words

Chelsea Manager Gets Fired, As All Chelsea Managers Do

Apr 23·1 min read·9 words

Mike Vrabel To Seek Counseling Over “Completely Innocent Interaction” With Dianna Russini [Update]

Apr 23·1 min read·13 words

Philadelphia’s Hottest Club Is The Penalty Box

Apr 23·1 min read·7 words

The Yankees Want To Dress Like All The Other Baseball Teams

Apr 22·1 min read·11 words

Is It Wrong To Use The Fear Of A Vengeful Easter Bunny To Get My Kid To Eat?

Apr 22·1 min read·18 words

This Frickin’ Guy

Apr 22·1 min read·3 words

Micro Aura Transgressions, With Giri Nathan

Apr 22·1 min read·6 words

Nats To Fans: Hey Everybody, Look What Dumbasses Our Players Are!

Apr 22·1 min read·11 words

Billy Donovan Hops Onto The NBA’s Slow-Moving Coaching Carousel

Apr 22·1 min read·9 words

Formula 1’s Emergency Midseason Regulation Changes, Explained

Apr 22·1 min read·7 words

Pete Hegseth Adds New Weapon To American Warfighter Loadout: Influenza

Apr 22·1 min read·10 words

The Scariest Part Of A Concussion Is The Uncertainty

Apr 22·1 min read·9 words

A Game Of ‘Clue’ Turns Into Open Warfare

Apr 21·1 min read·8 words

Mike Vrabel Says A Whole Lot Of Nothing About Dianna Russini Photos

Apr 21·1 min read·12 words

Can’t Miss That

Apr 21·1 min read·3 words

What I Found Sorting Through 1,200 T-Shirts My Son Left Behind

Apr 21·1 min read·11 words

Did You Hear? Cribl, Axonius, And Netskope Were At The Game

Apr 21·1 min read·11 words

Connor McWhovid?

Apr 21·1 min read·2 words

Tom Dundon Applies His Chintzy Tactics To The Trail Blazers

Apr 21·1 min read·10 words

The Fatherless Fantasy Of ‘Bridgerton’

Apr 21·1 min read·5 words

Madison Square Garden Has A Reluctant New Villain

Apr 21·1 min read·8 words

Delete The Mets

Apr 20·1 min read·3 words

Munetaka Murakami Watch: Big Homers, Wacky Numbers

Apr 20·1 min read·7 words

Manchester City Helpfully Extends Arsenal’s Freefall

Apr 20·1 min read·6 words

The Crossword, April 20: Haute Cuisine

Apr 20·1 min read·6 words

The Block, As Remembered By The Guy Who Called It And The Guy Who Let It Be

Apr 20·1 min read·17 words

The Decline Of Pro Football Focus Is Bad News For Football Fans

Apr 20·1 min read·12 words

This Phone Video From Artemis Is So Damn Cool

Apr 20·1 min read·9 words

It Ain’t Over Till It’s Buffalover

Apr 20·1 min read·6 words

Victor Wembanyama’s Playoff Debut Was Worth The Wait

Apr 20·1 min read·8 words

Allow Arthur Fils To Reintroduce Himself

Apr 19·1 min read·6 words

Someone Appears To Be Stuck On The Jumbotron

Apr 19·1 min read·8 words

LeBron James Still Has It

Apr 19·1 min read·5 words

The Sweeties And Enemies Of The NHL Playoffs

Apr 17·1 min read·8 words

Mason Miller Is Blowing Everyone Away

Apr 17·1 min read·6 words

Hark! Follow The Sounding Of The Horns To The 2026 NBA Playoff Preview

Apr 17·1 min read·13 words

LaMelo Ball Gets Let Off The Hook

Apr 17·1 min read·7 words

I Have Now Perfected My Blondie Recipe

Apr 17·1 min read·7 words

The Avs Have Won Nothing

Apr 17·1 min read·5 words

Steven Soderbergh And Ed Solomon Talk About Their Best Collaboration Yet

Apr 17·1 min read·11 words

Bayern Munich Did Not Believe In Magic

Apr 16·1 min read·7 words

Jarringly Red New York Radio Yutz Continues His Anti-Mets Tantrum In Yankees President’s Suite

Apr 16·1 min read·14 words

A Year After The Corrections Officer Strike, New York Is Still Failing Its Incarcerated Population

Apr 16·1 min read·15 words

A New Space In Which To Be Stupid, With Michael Schur

Apr 16·1 min read·11 words

The Warriors’ Old Guys Showed Up When It Mattered Most

Apr 16·1 min read·10 words

The Robberies Have Begun Again

Apr 16·1 min read·5 words

New York Islanders Raise Money For A Convicted Killer Because He’s A Cop

Apr 16·1 min read·13 words

It Is The Spring Of The Downtrodden

Apr 16·1 min read·7 words

Behold! The ‘Nothing But Respect’ NBA Playoffs Mega-Preview

Apr 16·1 min read·8 words

The Killing That Won’t Let Go

Apr 16·1 min read·6 words

Please End This Cursed Liverpool Season

Apr 15·1 min read·6 words

You Can Never Let Them Think They Have A Chance

Apr 15·1 min read·10 words

Should I Take My Two-Year-Old To A Soccer Match Abroad, Or Can I Leave Him At Home?

Apr 15·1 min read·17 words

“Strong Fish Smell In Cabin,” And Other Pilot-To-Ground Texts

Apr 15·1 min read·9 words

Paul’s Here

Apr 15·1 min read·2 words

The Hardest Part Of History To Tell Is How It Felt

Apr 15·1 min read·11 words

The Blue Jackets Have Driven Another Coach Raving Mad

Apr 15·1 min read·9 words

World Cup Transit Is Broken Before It Has Begun

Apr 15·1 min read·9 words

Dianna Russini Resigns From The Athletic

Apr 14·1 min read·6 words

How Many People Would It Take To Storm Mar-A-Lago?

Apr 14·1 min read·9 words

Achieve Information Independence Via Defector’s Spring Sale

Apr 14·1 min read·7 words

Report: FIFA Plans To Ask Peace Prize Winner If He Would Maybe Consider Pausing Domestic Terrorism Program For One Month

Apr 14·1 min read·20 words

Valkyries GM Declines To Explain Why She Traded Flau’jae Johnson For Two Second-Rounders

Apr 14·1 min read·13 words

My Year In November 18ths

Apr 14·1 min read·5 words

It’s The NHL Playoff Preview … NOT!

Apr 14·1 min read·7 words

Chappell Roan And Jorginho Are No Longer Beefing

Apr 14·1 min read·8 words

Carolyn Swords Sees The WNBA Becoming The League She Hoped For

Apr 14·1 min read·11 words

President, Extremely Normal Brain-Wise: Pope Weak On Crime, Also I’m Dr. Jesus Christ

Apr 14·1 min read·13 words

Jannik Sinner And Carlos Alcaraz Swap Places On The Mountaintop

Apr 13·1 min read·10 words

It’s Clear To Me Now That Manchester City Must Topple Arsenal

Apr 13·1 min read·11 words

Doc Rivers Ends Bucks Tenure That Was A Huge Waste Of Everyone’s Time

Apr 13·1 min read·13 words

Please Enjoy These Photos Of Damp And Drunk People At An English Horse Race

Apr 13·1 min read·14 words

Wout van Aert Forever

Apr 13·1 min read·4 words

And Now It Is Time To Forget The NBA’s Regular Season

Apr 13·1 min read·11 words

The Crossword, April 13: Call ‘Em Like I See ‘Em

Apr 13·1 min read·10 words

One Angeleno’s Journey Through Olympics Ticket Madness

Apr 13·1 min read·7 words

Rory McIlroy Held On Just Long Enough

Apr 13·1 min read·7 words

In Praise Of Cafe du Monde And Tourist Trap Eateries Everywhere

Apr 12·1 min read·11 words

‘Last One Laughing UK’ Is Absurdly Funny

Apr 12·1 min read·7 words

New UFC Ad Rebuilds The White House

Apr 12·1 min read·7 words

New York Radio Yutz Has Had It With Mr. Met’s Antisemitism

Apr 10·1 min read·11 words

NBA Investigates Kings For Tanking, Determines That They’re Just Ass

Apr 10·1 min read·10 words

‘The Drama’ Has More Going For It Than A Provocative Twist

Apr 10·1 min read·11 words

Do You Know These Men?

Apr 10·1 min read·5 words

The College Trip

Apr 10·1 min read·3 words

It’s Time For The Scariest Part Of Artemis

Apr 10·1 min read·8 words

Poor Suckers Who Ponied Up For Expensive World Cup Tickets Boned By FIFA

Apr 10·1 min read·13 words

Why Would You Ask AI To Tell The Story Of Your Own Life?

Apr 10·1 min read·13 words

A Feast Of Sludge, With Ed Zitron

Apr 9·1 min read·7 words

The Trump Administration Is Killing The U.S. Forest Service So It Can Also Kill U.S. Forests

Apr 9·1 min read·16 words

Men’s Tennis Is, Once Again, Too Fast

Apr 9·1 min read·7 words

Tony Vitello Might Be Too Candid For His Own Good

Apr 9·1 min read·10 words

Free Press Dipshit Humiliates Herself In Public Again

Apr 9·1 min read·8 words

The Best Songs Of Q1 2026

Apr 9·1 min read·6 words

A Post-Tournament Prospect Prospectus, With David Roth

Apr 9·1 min read·7 words

What Comes After The Garden?

Apr 9·1 min read·5 words

The 65-Game Rule Exacerbates The Fake Problem It Was Intended To Solve

Apr 8·1 min read·12 words

Mike Vrabel And Dianna Russini Insist There’s Nothing Strange About Them Holding Hands And Hugging At A Hotel

Apr 8·1 min read·18 words

Brazilian Funk Continues Innovating Methods For Getting Your Shit Rocked

Apr 8·1 min read·10 words

Anatomy Of A Gaucho

Apr 8·1 min read·4 words

Can I Tell Another Parent That I Despise One Of My Kid’s Peers?

Apr 8·1 min read·13 words

Advances In Basebrawl Weaponry Are Being Made Every Day

Apr 8·1 min read·9 words

Revisiting Dashboard Confessional, 25 Years Later

Apr 8·1 min read·6 words

What Is A Strike

Apr 8·1 min read·4 words

An Uzbek Chess Prodigy Is Laying Waste To The World’s Best Players

Apr 7·1 min read·12 words

You Can’t Go Home Again, But You Can Visit

Apr 7·1 min read·9 words

Willson Contreras Is Sick And Tired Of Being Plunked By The Brewers

Apr 7·1 min read·12 words

I Wanna Be A Cowboy

Apr 7·1 min read·5 words

I Guess We’re Just Waiting Around To See If This Demented Psychopath Kills Everyone

Apr 7·1 min read·14 words

No One Is Safe In The Champions League Quarterfinals

Apr 7·1 min read·9 words

Why We Fly

Apr 7·1 min read·3 words

Michigan Met Connecticut In The Muck And Won

Apr 7·1 min read·8 words

Mike Trout Starts Hitting, Is Rewarded With Fastballs Directed At His Chin

Apr 6·1 min read·12 words

The Chicago Sky Cost Themselves Angel Reese

Apr 6·1 min read·7 words

Giannis Antetokounmpo And The Bucks Are Feuding Right To The End

Apr 6·1 min read·11 words

What Would You Do Behind The Moon?

Apr 6·1 min read·7 words

The Islanders Swap Coaches With Four Games Left In A Playoff Chase

Apr 6·1 min read·12 words

A Vengeful Deity Is Smiting The Lakers

Apr 6·1 min read·7 words

Polymarket Apologizes For Taking Bets On American Pilots Downed Over Iran

Apr 6·1 min read·11 words

The Crossword, April 6: Hit Parade

Apr 6·1 min read·6 words

Cori Close And UCLA Won At Their Own Speed

Apr 6·1 min read·9 words

Jo Adell Stole Three Homers And A Win From The Mariners

Apr 5·1 min read·11 words

Monet, Through The Iris

Apr 5·1 min read·4 words

Michigan Is Nasty

Apr 5·1 min read·3 words

South Carolina Upset Connecticut, But Not As Much As Dawn Staley Upset Geno Auriemma

Apr 5·1 min read·14 words

A Very Sweaty Tiger Woods Called Donald Trump After His Car Wreck

Apr 3·1 min read·12 words

Is Konnor Griffin Actually 19 Years Old? Let’s Discuss

Apr 3·1 min read·9 words

Tech Media Propaganda Operation Makes It Official, Goes In-House At OpenAI

Apr 3·1 min read·11 words

Welcome To The Defector ‘Survivor 50’ Midseason Questionnaire

Apr 3·1 min read·8 words

It’s Time To Grow Up

Apr 3·1 min read·5 words

The Wild Card Race Gives Me A Tummy Ache

Apr 3·1 min read·9 words

Artemis Took A Picture Of Us

Apr 3·1 min read·6 words

The Gentle Parenting Of Ben Lerner’s ‘Transcription’

Apr 3·1 min read·7 words

Female Ref Sues NFL For Discrimination, Says She Was Told To “Shut Your Fucking Mouth” By Another Official

Apr 2·1 min read·18 words

Chartreuse And Root Beer, With Kelsey McKinney

Apr 2·1 min read·7 words

Ons Jabeur Is Making It Harder For The Tennis World To Ignore Palestine

Apr 2·1 min read·13 words

Victor Wembanyama Fattened Up At The Shrimp Buffet

Apr 2·1 min read·8 words

Erewhon Is Not A Grocery Store

Apr 2·1 min read·6 words

The San Jose Sharks Keep Winning At The Last Possible Moment

Apr 2·1 min read·11 words

Puka Nacua Is In Rehab

Apr 2·1 min read·5 words

Artemis Boldly Goes Where No Toilet Has Gone Before

Apr 2·1 min read·9 words

Florida Picks A Stupid Fight Over The NFL’s Rooney Rule

Apr 1·1 min read·10 words

Oops, Italy Did It Again, Again!

Apr 1·1 min read·6 words

Rejoice, Tired Parents! Defector Will Raise Your Children Now

Apr 1·1 min read·9 words

A Basketball Team Can Be Sold, But Who Owns Its History?

Apr 1·1 min read·11 words

Go Ahead And Use AI. It Will Only Help Me Dominate You.

Apr 1·1 min read·12 words

C.B. Bucknor Fucking Up All Over The Place

Apr 1·1 min read·8 words

I Demand That Jay-Z Perform All Of ‘Kingdom Come’ At His Yankee Stadium Concert

Apr 1·1 min read·14 words

Affidavit: Tiger Woods Had Hydrocodone Pills In His Pocket, Was “Sweating Profusely” After Crash

Mar 31·1 min read·14 words

Jaden Ivey Lost His Mind And Then His Job

Mar 31·1 min read·9 words

What’s The Riskiest Thing You’ve Survived Eating?

Mar 31·1 min read·7 words

Justin Verlander’s Had Better Days

Mar 31·1 min read·5 words

It Is Time To Canonize A New Baseball Saint

Mar 31·1 min read·9 words

What’s The Value Of An Ass-Kicking Freely Offered?

Mar 31·1 min read·8 words

Critical New Jersey Hoops Survey, With Papo2oo4

Mar 31·1 min read·7 words

South Carolina Forgets But Doesn’t Forgive

Mar 31·1 min read·6 words

The Sacramento Athletics Are A Wind Farm

Mar 31·1 min read·7 words

This Election Is Too Darn Important To Be Left To Merciful Salad Eaters

Mar 31·1 min read·13 words

Rayan Cherki Is A Human Highlight Reel

Mar 30·1 min read·7 words

The Raptors’ 31-0 Run Was As Gross As It Was Great To Behold

Mar 30·1 min read·13 words

Formula 1’s Engine Troubles Come To A Head In Japan

Mar 30·1 min read·10 words

RFK Jr.’s Offal Advice

Mar 30·1 min read·4 words

The UConn Buzzer-Beater Was A Flawless Short Film

Mar 30·1 min read·8 words

Las Vegas Is Ready For The John Tortorella Experience

Mar 30·1 min read·9 words

The Crossword, March 30: Feeling Good (Themeless)

Mar 30·1 min read·7 words

Defector’s Resident Nu Metalheads Discuss Mason Miller’s Nu Entrance Music

Mar 30·1 min read·10 words

For Now, ABS Makes Good Theater

Mar 30·1 min read·6 words

Two Dazed Freshmen Authored The Tournament’s Immortal Moment

Mar 30·1 min read·8 words

Ilia Malinin Is Back

Mar 29·1 min read·4 words

Olivia Miles Was Made For March Highlight Reels

Mar 29·1 min read·8 words

Tiger Woods Charged With Suspicion Of DUI In Florida

Mar 29·1 min read·9 words

Make It Nice: Mirror Mirror On The Wall

Mar 27·1 min read·8 words

A Bit Of Church

Mar 27·1 min read·4 words

Keeping Big Mountain Freestyle Riders Alive Is A Lot Of Work

Mar 27·1 min read·11 words

‘Imperfect Women’ Is The Latest Entry In A Fittingly Flawed Genre

Mar 27·1 min read·11 words

Fred Hoiberg Really Fucked Up

Mar 27·1 min read·5 words

We’ve Got To Get Linda Caicedo Out Of Bum-Ass Real Madrid

Mar 26·1 min read·11 words

Please, Mr. Pibb Is My Father, With Emma Baccellieri

Mar 26·1 min read·9 words

IOC Reinstates Chromosome Testing, Banning Trans Women From Competition

Mar 26·1 min read·9 words

The Wolves And Rockets Held An Incredible Meltdown-Off

Mar 26·1 min read·8 words

They Don’t Have Lip Filler, They Just Have Lip Filler Accent

Mar 26·1 min read·11 words

Who Killed Rock And Roll?

Mar 26·1 min read·5 words

We Asked The Mayor Of Ottawa Why He Keeps Posting Such Grim Photos

Mar 26·1 min read·13 words

Béisbol!

Mar 26·1 min read·1 words

Netflix Baseball Looks Like Shit

Mar 26·1 min read·5 words

Now That OpenAI Has Terminated Sora, How Will I Have This Blog Read To Me By An Uncanny Buxom Mike Wazowski?

Mar 25·1 min read·21 words

All Hail Danny Welbeck, The Lord Of The Premier League

Mar 25·1 min read·10 words

Netflix Is Loading Up The Clown Car For Opening Night

Mar 25·1 min read·10 words

Spring Is Truly Here: Formula 1 Teams Are Slapfighting Over Regulations Compliance

Mar 25·1 min read·12 words

Why I Got Out Of The Gambling Business

Mar 25·1 min read·8 words

Suburban Homeowner Starts, Loses Fight With Enormous Jack Reacher Star Alan Ritchson

Mar 24·1 min read·12 words

Quadruple Amputee Cornhole Pro Charged With Murder

Mar 24·1 min read·7 words

Help! I Can’t Stop Farting In My Personal Office!

Mar 24·1 min read·9 words

A Pox Upon Whoever Spared The Rangers From Nine-Shot Ignominy

Mar 24·1 min read·10 words

James Dolan Uses Madison Square Garden To Honor New York’s Finest Mobile Gamers

Mar 24·1 min read·13 words

Syracuse Coach After 53-Point Loss: Please Don’t Make Us Play UConn Again

Mar 24·1 min read·12 words

Namwali Serpell On Understanding Toni Morrison The Author, Not The Icon

Mar 24·1 min read·11 words

Welcome To The Craziest Possible WNBA Offseason, With Maitreyi Anantharaman

Mar 24·1 min read·10 words

Baseball Is Almost Back, And Almost Gone

Mar 24·1 min read·7 words

Carlos Alcaraz Is Getting Tired Of Facing So Many Roger Federers

Mar 23·1 min read·11 words

Doesn’t Anybody Want To Win This Wretched Division?

Mar 23·1 min read·8 words

Minnesota’s Buzzer-Beater Sounded Like Home

Mar 23·1 min read·5 words

ICE Agents Deployed To Nation’s Swamped Airports To Stand Around And Do Nothing

Mar 23·1 min read·13 words

Tottenham Keeps Finding New Lows

Mar 23·1 min read·5 words

I Miss My Jump Shot

Mar 23·1 min read·5 words

The Crossword, March 23: March Madness

Mar 23·1 min read·6 words

Chappell Roan And Jorginho Are Beefing

Mar 23·1 min read·6 words

St. John’s Won Funny

Mar 23·1 min read·4 words

Luka Doncic And Goga Bitadze Debate Whether They Threatened To Fuck Each Other’s Family Members In A Second Language

Mar 22·1 min read·19 words

Cam Skattebo Sorry For Saying CTE And Asthma Are Fake

Mar 22·1 min read·10 words

The Cascadia Rivalry Was Totally Bonkers

Mar 22·1 min read·6 words

Tadej Pogacar Takes One Beautiful Step Closer To Completing Cycling

Mar 22·1 min read·10 words

Rob Martin Will Always Be A Short King Of March

Mar 22·1 min read·10 words

The Not-At-All-Secret Life Of Taylor Frankie Paul

Mar 20·1 min read·7 words

Not Satisfied By Fernando Alonso’s Limbs, Aston Martin’s Accursed Car Also Consumes Team Principal

Mar 20·1 min read·14 words

It’s Child Week

Mar 20·1 min read·3 words

The New Evangelists

Mar 20·1 min read·3 words

I’m So Sorry To Tell You This But The Lakers Must Be Taken Seriously

Mar 20·1 min read·14 words

Dam It All To Hell

Mar 20·1 min read·5 words

The Tournament’s Best Subplot Is Shea Ralph Vs. Her Old Coach

Mar 20·1 min read·11 words

High Point Is A Deeply Weird School

Mar 20·1 min read·7 words

Let’s Get Upset, With Ken Pomeroy

Mar 19·1 min read·6 words

It’s Gambling

Mar 19·1 min read·2 words

Why The Thunder Have Been Cast As The NBA’s Villains, With Tyler Parker

Mar 19·1 min read·13 words

We Have A New Culture Newsletter

Mar 19·1 min read·6 words

The Central Is So Nasty

Mar 19·1 min read·5 words

Who Told Scott Ostler He Was Allowed To Retire?

Mar 19·1 min read·9 words

The Hottest Snack Of The NCAA Tournament Is Almond Butter

Mar 19·1 min read·10 words

Stephen Fishbach’s Reality-TV Novel Is More Reality TV Than Novel

Mar 19·1 min read·10 words

Hockey Boy Wants His Hockey Puck

Mar 19·1 min read·6 words

There Is No Resting State Of March Madness

Mar 19·1 min read·8 words

Howard’s First NCAA Tournament Win Was A Long Time Coming

Mar 18·1 min read·10 words

The WNBA And Players’ Union Have A Verbal Agreement On A New CBA

Mar 18·1 min read·13 words

Good Riddance To Red Asses

Mar 18·1 min read·5 words

Oklahoma City Thunder Defense Innovates With Sneaker Block

Mar 18·1 min read·8 words

Let’s Catch Up On The Hilarious Afroman Defamation Trial

Mar 18·1 min read·9 words

Viva Venezuela, A Champion At Last

Mar 18·1 min read·6 words

The Titans Will Dress Like A Real NFL Team This Season

Mar 18·1 min read·11 words

Donald Trump Is Strangling Cuba To Death

Mar 18·1 min read·7 words

Team USA Lost For The Troops

Mar 18·1 min read·6 words

Former NBPA Head Tamika Tremaglio Discusses The WNBA Labor Battle And The Art Of Bargaining

Mar 17·1 min read·15 words

I Can’t Get Enough Of The Kaiju Battle Between Aryna Sabalenka And Elena Rybakina

Mar 17·1 min read·14 words

I Can’t Stop Reading Music History Books

Mar 17·1 min read·7 words

Fair Pay Feels Good In A Place Like This

Mar 17·1 min read·9 words

Even After Being Eaten, This Beetle Has Two Ways Out Alive

Mar 17·1 min read·11 words

The NBA’s Expansion Gambit Is About Getting Bigger, Not Better

Mar 17·1 min read·10 words

What Did The Migrating Bigfoot Family Know About This Ohio Meteor Explosion?

Mar 17·1 min read·12 words

Nvidia Wants To Yassify Video Games

Mar 17·1 min read·6 words

A Series Of Facts About ‘Goat,’ The Steph Curry Goat Movie

Mar 17·1 min read·11 words

Teenager Max Dowman Gave Arsenal A Major Coolness Boost

Mar 16·1 min read·9 words

Brooches Won The Oscars

Mar 16·1 min read·4 words

Paul Thomas Anderson Finally Gets His Coronation

Mar 16·1 min read·7 words

The Sacramento Kings Can’t Even Lose On Purpose

Mar 16·1 min read·8 words

Trump To World: Please Help Me Un-Shoot My Own Leg Off

Mar 16·1 min read·11 words

Can I Interest You In A Billiken?

Mar 16·1 min read·7 words

Fernando Alonso’s Extremities Pulped For Pointless Laps In A Worthless Lemon

Mar 16·1 min read·11 words

The Crossword, March 16: Big Blowup

Mar 16·1 min read·6 words

Mentally Ill Former Navy SEAL Inspires Team USA To WBC Final

Mar 16·1 min read·11 words

The Chinese GP Proves Mercedes Domination Might Still Be Fun

Mar 15·1 min read·10 words

Nobody’s Having More Fun Than The Italians

Mar 15·1 min read·7 words

Auston Matthews Is Hurt And The Maple Leafs Are Burnt Toast

Mar 13·1 min read·11 words

Big 12 Pulls Glass Court Following Conference Tournament Fiasco

Mar 13·1 min read·9 words

Rickea Jackson Told Court James Pearce Jr. “Will Kill Me”

Mar 13·1 min read·10 words

R&B Wants To Make Pop Music Fun Again

Mar 13·1 min read·8 words

That Puck Must Have Said Something About Tage Thompson’s Mother

Mar 13·1 min read·10 words

Vikings Attempt To Replicate Sam Darnold Experiment By Signing Shorter, Moodier Sam Darnold

Mar 13·1 min read·13 words

Vindicated At Last In My Years-Long Loathing Of Grammarly

Mar 13·1 min read·9 words

Kebab Juice On The Windowpane, With Rohan Nadkarni

Mar 12·1 min read·8 words

Live Nation Gets To Keep Its Monopoly Thanks To Trump’s Department Of Justice

Mar 12·1 min read·13 words

Competitive Scrabble Is A Lexical Shitshow

Mar 12·1 min read·6 words

UFC And FBI Announce Two Days Of Activities For Kash Patel

Mar 12·1 min read·11 words

A List Of Better Ways To Experience The Frisson Of Transgression Than Becoming A Fascist

Mar 12·1 min read·15 words

Netflix Has Trapped Pete Davidson In His Garage

Mar 12·1 min read·8 words

This Pink Bug Is Not A “Rare Freak Mutant” After All

Mar 12·1 min read·11 words

The Academy Missed Some Of 2025’s Best Film Scores

Mar 12·1 min read·9 words

There’s Always A Way To Deny The Undeniable

Mar 11·1 min read·8 words

Iran Plans To Boycott World Cup Due To FIFA Peace Prize Winner’s Murderous, Unprovoked War

Mar 11·1 min read·15 words

Associated “Association Update” Update, With Will Anderson Of Hotline TNT

Mar 11·1 min read·10 words

Joao Fonseca Takes Jannik Sinner To The Limit, And Justifies The Hype

Mar 11·1 min read·12 words

I Will Never Forgive Trae Young For Surpassing Kobe Bryant’s Career High For Assists In A Game Eight Times

Mar 11·1 min read·19 words

Report: Unflattering Pictures Of Pete Hegseth Got Photographers Banned From Pentagon Briefings

Mar 11·1 min read·12 words

The Wizards Deserve This Humiliation

Mar 11·1 min read·5 words

I Am Standing By For News

Mar 11·1 min read·6 words

Boston’s World Cup Stakeholders Are Squabbling Over Money

Mar 11·1 min read·8 words

Maxx Crosby Is Back In Football Purgatory

Mar 11·1 min read·7 words

Bam Adebayo Breaks The Concept Of Basketball, Scores 83 Points

Mar 11·1 min read·10 words

Mark DeRosa Might’ve Boned This Big-Time

Mar 11·1 min read·6 words

Even At The World Baseball Classic, The Mariners Cannot Escape Themselves

Mar 10·1 min read·11 words

The Atlanta Hawks’ Magic City Night Was Too Misunderstood To Live

Mar 10·1 min read·11 words

My Coworkers Browbeat Me Into Drinking James Harden’s Wine

Mar 10·1 min read·9 words

The Kindness Of Familiar Faces

Mar 10·1 min read·5 words

If Cool The Pan Be, A Lousy Breakfast For Thee

Mar 10·1 min read·10 words

Madison Booker’s Game Punishes The Tryhard Defender

Mar 10·1 min read·7 words

Senior Day Ain’t What It Used To Be

Mar 10·1 min read·8 words

Report: President Donald Trump Is Giving “All The Boys” Dress Shoes That Don’t Fit Right

Mar 10·1 min read·15 words

Who Deserves To Win The NBA Draft Lottery?

Mar 9·1 min read·8 words

Is Nellie Bowles The Worst Writer In America?

Mar 9·1 min read·8 words

Iran Women’s Soccer Team Is Feeling The Effects Of The War All The Way In Australia

Mar 9·1 min read·16 words

Where Does Tua Tagovailoa Go From Here?

Mar 9·1 min read·7 words

We Have Obtained More Footage Of Kash Patel Falling Down While Playing Hockey

Mar 9·1 min read·13 words

The Sabres And Lightning Brawled, Scored, And Cemented A Wild New Rivalry

Mar 9·1 min read·12 words

The Crossword, March 9: Music Round

Mar 9·1 min read·6 words

I Have So Many Nice Things To Say About The Avalanche And The Wild

Mar 9·1 min read·14 words

Jayson Tatum Might Redefine Basketball’s Worst Injury, Or Might Not

Mar 9·1 min read·10 words

It’s Just Another Day In ‘Paradise’ Cover Song Hell

Mar 8·1 min read·9 words

Dan Simmons Is Dead So It’s Time To Read ‘Hyperion’

Mar 8·1 min read·10 words

The World Baseball Classic Is Already Producing Some Classic World Baseball

Mar 8·1 min read·11 words

New F1 Season, New Regulations, Same Old Ferrari Fuck-Up

Mar 8·1 min read·9 words

I Bought A Ticket To The Connor McDavid Show And A Hurricanes Game Broke Out

Mar 7·1 min read·15 words

The Road To Magic City Monday Is Paved With Good Intentions

Mar 6·1 min read·11 words

It’s Angst Day In Canada’s Angst Capital

Mar 6·1 min read·7 words

‘Survivor’ Is Better When Everyone Gets A Little Silly With It

Mar 6·1 min read·11 words

Lou Holtz Lisped Like A Champion

Mar 6·1 min read·6 words

A Helpful Explainer Of Kansas’s Lunatic Anti-Trans Law

Mar 6·1 min read·8 words

Newly Poly Plover Dad Still Figuring Out His Time Management

Mar 6·1 min read·10 words

It’s A Dome That’s Shaped Like A Saddle

Mar 6·1 min read·8 words

An Exquisite 2026 Formula 1 Preview For True Sophisticates

Mar 6·1 min read·9 words

As Best We Can Tell, Kristi Noem Is Now A Green Lantern Or Some Shit

Mar 5·1 min read·15 words

Imagining The End Of College Sports, With Spencer Hall

Mar 5·1 min read·9 words

An Interview With A Tenant Who Doesn’t Have Heat In Giannis Antetokounmpo’s Building

Mar 5·1 min read·13 words

Antoine Griezmann Is Still Too Good To Go

Mar 5·1 min read·8 words

Aston Martin: Driving Our Car Will Maim You

Mar 5·1 min read·8 words

How I Became A Target For Right-Wing Freaks At The Australian Open

Mar 5·1 min read·12 words

No, Seriously, Pay Attention To The Charlotte Hornets

Mar 5·1 min read·8 words

What’s Going On With The WNBA CBA Talks?

Mar 5·1 min read·8 words

Lost Recipes

Mar 5·1 min read·2 words

Report: Tyson Vs. Mayweather, The Con In The Congo, Is Off For Now

Mar 4·1 min read·13 words

U.S. Half-Marathon Championships Thrown Into Chaos After Leaders Accidentally Led Off Course

Mar 4·1 min read·12 words

New York Or Nowhere, With Will Menaker

Mar 4·1 min read·7 words

World Baseball Classic, Or Assic?

Mar 4·1 min read·5 words

Kyler Murray Dishonorably Discharged

Mar 4·1 min read·4 words

Kyler Murray Dishonorably Discharged

Mar 4·1 min read·4 words

Which Chimp Should Wield The Crystal?

Mar 4·1 min read·6 words

Don DeLillo’s Funniest Novel Is A 1980 Hockey Sex Romp He Won’t Acknowledge

Mar 4·1 min read·13 words

I Burp My House Now

Mar 3·1 min read·5 words

Nikola Jokic Is A Mountain Of Angst

Mar 3·1 min read·7 words

Yoko Tawada Is A Genius In Any Language

Mar 3·1 min read·8 words

Trae Young Got Ejected From A Wizards Game Before He Ever Played In One

Mar 3·1 min read·14 words

Anyone Want To See Kash Patel Fall On His Ass While Playing Hockey?

Mar 3·1 min read·13 words

Why Is Soccer’s Most Famous Scoopster Doing PR Work For Saudi Arabia?

Mar 3·1 min read·12 words

The NWSL Offseason Put Important New Faces In New Places

Mar 3·1 min read·10 words

Daniil Medvedev’s Tennis Plans Interrupted By Unrelated Global Crisis

Mar 2·1 min read·9 words

Cycling Prodigy Paul Seixas Accepts The Sport’s Defining Burden

Mar 2·1 min read·9 words

Pat Riley To NBA Coaches: Would It Kill You To Put On A Nice Suit For Once?

Mar 2·1 min read·17 words

Tottenham Is Not Too Big To Fail

Mar 2·1 min read·7 words

Talking To A. Natasha Joukovsky About Men, Myths, And March Madness

Mar 2·1 min read·11 words

New Japan Makes, The World Takes

Mar 2·1 min read·6 words

The Crossword, March 2: College Athletes

Mar 2·1 min read·6 words

Donald Trump Can’t Even Pretend To Explain The Plan For Iran

Mar 2·1 min read·11 words

How Can You Not Be Romantic About Women’s Basketball?

Mar 2·1 min read·9 words

Regime Change Is Blowing Up A School Full Of Children

Mar 1·1 min read·10 words

Mets Prospect Might Be 80 Percent Egg At This Point

Mar 1·1 min read·10 words

Enough Of Lu Dort’s Little Leg Bullshit

Mar 1·1 min read·7 words

Steve Kerr Remembers Too Late That He Is Not A Doctor

Mar 1·1 min read·11 words

Come One, Come All, And Ask The Defector Staff Some Questions

Feb 27·1 min read·11 words

Meta’s Defense In Social Media Addiction Trial Is Basically A Shrug

Feb 27·1 min read·11 words

Victor Wembanyama Sighting Confirmed In Brooklyn

Feb 27·1 min read·6 words

Paramount Wins Hostile Takeover Bid For Warner Bros.

Feb 27·1 min read·8 words

Confessions Of A Bookanizer

Feb 27·1 min read·4 words

The NFLPA Player Survey That Owners Hate Was Never Going To Stay Secret

Feb 27·1 min read·13 words

The Greatest Traitor Of All Time

Feb 27·1 min read·6 words

A Complimentary Profile Of Jason Lee That Was Surprisingly Difficult To Publish

Feb 27·1 min read·12 words

The Mournful Ballad Of Punch The Monkey

Feb 26·1 min read·7 words

Wait, Whoa, The Spurs Are Way Ahead Of Schedule

Feb 26·1 min read·9 words

What Sort Of NBA Does Adam Silver Want To Build In Europe?

Feb 26·1 min read·12 words

The Big Winner Of The Champions League Playoff Was Its Smallest Team

Feb 26·1 min read·12 words

Fixing Tanking By Making Everything More Confusing, With Tom Ley

Feb 26·1 min read·10 words

Jeffrey Epstein Appeared To Be A Big Joakim Noah Fan

Feb 26·1 min read·10 words

St. John’s Delivered A Truly Unholy Second Half Of Basketball

Feb 26·1 min read·10 words

What I Listened To In The Hospital

Feb 26·1 min read·7 words

Internal Schedule Confirms Kash Patel Went To Olympics To Be World’s Most Special Little Guy

Feb 26·1 min read·15 words

I Lost My Mind Watching (Almost) All Of ‘Survivor’ In A Year

Feb 25·1 min read·12 words

Arte Moreno Is Done Pretending To Care

Feb 25·1 min read·7 words

Tank Me Later, With Ock Sportello And Sam Sheehan

Feb 25·1 min read·9 words

An Extensive And Exhaustive Player-By-Player Preview Of ‘Survivor 50’

Feb 25·1 min read·9 words

What I Learned From My Annoyingly Long Correspondence With “Elena Ferrante”

Feb 25·1 min read·11 words

The U.S. Hockey Men Spoil The Fantasy

Feb 25·1 min read·7 words

Defector Wuthers Some Heights

Feb 24·1 min read·4 words

How Do I Get My Lazy Teen To Pick A College?

Feb 24·1 min read·11 words

Something Of Moderate Size And Importance Is Happening

Feb 24·1 min read·8 words

Is ‘Industry’ Losing Its Edge?

Feb 24·1 min read·5 words

What Should Recorded Musicals Do?

Feb 24·1 min read·5 words

Cherien Dabis Discusses The Challenges Of Writing, Filming, And Distributing A Palestinian Movie

Feb 24·1 min read·13 words

The Winter Olympics’ Sour Ending Was Just A Preview For Summer 2028

Feb 24·1 min read·12 words

One Big Punch Keeps Ryan Garcia’s Career Afloat

Feb 23·1 min read·8 words

Kash Patel Thinks He’s On The Team

Feb 23·1 min read·7 words

Jeffrey Epstein And His Network Of Rich Freaks Were Obsessed With The Chiropractor

Feb 23·1 min read·13 words

The Crossword, Feb. 23: It’s An Art, Not A Science (Themeless)

Feb 23·1 min read·11 words

Team USA Had The Golden Goalie

Feb 23·1 min read·6 words

Cardte Hicks Played Above The Rim And Ahead Of Her Time

Feb 23·1 min read·11 words

Finally! An Ancient Fish That Understood Life’s Terrors

Feb 22·1 min read·8 words

It’s Time To Get Cozy At The Podium

Feb 22·1 min read·8 words

Jack Hughes Sheds Blood And Teeth For His Country, U.S. Wins Olympic Gold

Feb 22·1 min read·13 words

Mikhail Shaidorov Celebrated Gold By Skating In A Panda Suit

Feb 22·1 min read·10 words

Still Country For Old Women

Feb 20·1 min read·5 words

Rich Paul’s Podcast Was Built To Be Useless

Feb 20·1 min read·8 words

Indian Skier Starts, Finishes Race

Feb 20·1 min read·5 words

A Season For Hope

Feb 20·1 min read·4 words

Ohhhhhhhh, Arsenal

Feb 20·1 min read·2 words

Alysa Liu Is Untouchable

Feb 20·1 min read·4 words

Team USA’s Gold Is Sweeter For The Struggle

Feb 20·1 min read·8 words

Emerald Fennell Now Going Moor-To-Moor Trying To Shock People

Feb 19·1 min read·9 words

Kevin Durant Neither Confirms Nor Denies The Latest Burner Allegations

Feb 19·1 min read·10 words

Across The Hog Line, With John Cullen

Feb 19·1 min read·7 words

Maybe LaMelo Ball Shouldn’t Have A Driver’s License

Feb 19·1 min read·8 words

Make It Nice: Curtains, Linens, And How To Figure Out What You Like

Feb 19·1 min read·13 words

I Finally Understand This Tara Lipinski Commercial

Feb 19·1 min read·7 words

Eileen Gu Will Never Be The Traitor JD Vance Wants Her To Be

Feb 19·1 min read·13 words

Quinn Hughes Almost Smiled

Feb 19·1 min read·4 words

All I Want Is A Women’s Hockey Broadcast That Talks About The Hockey

Feb 19·1 min read·13 words

Soccer Racismo Sounds The Same Every Time

Feb 18·1 min read·7 words

Canada Took A Czech Beating And Survived

Feb 18·1 min read·7 words

Mick Cronin Is Stuck In Baby Mode

Feb 18·1 min read·7 words

How Is A Figure Skater Like A Tree?

Feb 18·1 min read·8 words

Are The Fellas In Sync?

Feb 18·1 min read·5 words

Beautiful Wolfdog Now An Olympian

Feb 18·1 min read·5 words

The Suffering Of Lindsey Vonn

Feb 18·1 min read·5 words

How Do I Be Nice To A Jesus Freak?

Feb 17·1 min read·9 words

MLBPA Chief Tony Clark Is Stepping Down 10 Months Before Baseball’s CBA Expires

Feb 17·1 min read·13 words

Competitors In The Newest Olympic Sport Will Scale Extraordinary Heights Of Suffering

Feb 17·1 min read·12 words

Canada Needs Marie-Philip Poulin To Bail Them Out One More Time

Feb 17·1 min read·11 words

White People Online Are Really Excited About Lunar New Year

Feb 17·1 min read·10 words

Peeking Into The Durant Files, With Eamon Whalen

Feb 17·1 min read·8 words

A 2025-26 Champions League Playoff Preview For Your Enjoyment And Education

Feb 17·1 min read·11 words

Let’s Check In With The Knitting Olympians

Feb 17·1 min read·7 words

Doug Gottlieb Attacks Refs, Furniture After Loss

Feb 16·1 min read·7 words

A Tour Of The Sick-Ass Helmets Of Skeleton

Feb 16·1 min read·8 words

Casey Wasserman, Radioactive With Epstein Fallout, Says He Will Sell His Agency

Feb 16·1 min read·12 words

Why The Hottest New Pro Wrestling Chant Is “Fuck ICE”

Feb 16·1 min read·10 words

Bryce Harper Is Still Grouchy About Dave Dombrowski’s Loose Ponderings

Feb 16·1 min read·10 words

An Afternoon With Pliny The Younger

Feb 16·1 min read·6 words

The Crossword, Feb. 16: Swish

Feb 16·1 min read·5 words

Where Is Cinema?: An Interview With A.S. Hamrah

Feb 16·1 min read·8 words

Chromosome Testing Will Take Sports Back To The Dark Ages

Feb 16·1 min read·10 words

Which Terrifying Sliding Sport Would You Brave?

Feb 15·1 min read·7 words

This Backward Guy Medaled

Feb 15·1 min read·4 words

The Big Canada-Sweden Curling Beef, Explained

Feb 15·1 min read·6 words

Even Ilia Malinin Is Mortal

Feb 14·1 min read·5 words

Wawa: The Defector Review

Feb 13·1 min read·4 words

The Phillies Can Never Make Me Hate Nick Castellanos

Feb 13·1 min read·9 words

Giannis Antetokounmpo Has Become Exhausting

Feb 13·1 min read·5 words

The Utah Jazz Got Fined For Losing Too Oafishly

Feb 13·1 min read·9 words

The Outdoor Industry Needs Workers, And Workers Need Unions

Feb 13·1 min read·9 words

Choosing Your Pomeranian, With Kathryn Xu

Feb 12·1 min read·6 words

Famous Clients Bail On Casey Wasserman Over Gross Sex Emails To Ghislaine Maxwell

Feb 12·1 min read·13 words

Ukrainian Skeleton Slider Banned From Competition Over Helmet Honoring Athletes Killed By Russia

Feb 12·1 min read·13 words

High-Level, Actionable Insights From Watching Doubles Luge For The First Time

Feb 12·1 min read·11 words

The NBA Could Really Use A Break

Feb 12·1 min read·7 words

Damian Clara Was Italy’s Improbable Bastion

Feb 12·1 min read·6 words

There Are No Good Teams In The Premier League

Feb 12·1 min read·9 words

Ilia Malinin Brings Figure Skating To The Crossroads

Feb 11·1 min read·8 words

Team USA’s Speedy Children Delivered A Beatdown Of Canada

Feb 11·1 min read·9 words

Adulterous Norwegian Biathlete’s Appeal Denied

Feb 11·1 min read·5 words

Johannes Klæbo Ran Everybody Off The Course

Feb 11·1 min read·7 words

The Tigers Need More Than Nostalgia From Justin Verlander

Feb 11·1 min read·9 words

On The Breathtakingly Cynical Giannis Antetokounmpo Kalshi Investment

Feb 11·1 min read·8 words

Sam Darnold’s Super Bowl Tax Bill Is A Total Write-Off

Feb 11·1 min read·10 words

They Publish Books By “Women And Weirdos” In Their Free Time

Feb 11·1 min read·11 words

I Traveled 800 Miles To Eat Breakfast, Lunch, And Pizza At Criss Angel’s Breakfast, Lunch, And Pizza

Feb 11·1 min read·17 words

The Saga Of The French Teammate-Defrauder Taught Me To Appreciate The Essence Of Biathlon

Feb 10·1 min read·14 words

Norwegian Biathlete, At Summit Of His Life’s Work: I Cheated On My Girlfriend

Feb 10·1 min read·13 words

Kim Caldwell Is Running Out Of Hard Truths To Deliver

Feb 10·1 min read·10 words

The Real Highlight Of The Super Bowl Was Josh McDaniels Eating Shit

Feb 10·1 min read·12 words

Which Other Olympic Mascots Could Italian Stoats Tina And Milo Slaughter In Cold Blood?

Feb 10·1 min read·14 words

Pistons Pissed, Hornets Stung, Beef Stew Beefs, Too

Feb 10·1 min read·8 words

Olympic Photographers: Stop Doing The Lugers Dirty

Feb 10·1 min read·7 words

France’s Viral Ice Dancing Team Has A Dark Backstory

Feb 10·1 min read·9 words

The Patriots Offensive Line Got Obliterated

Feb 9·1 min read·6 words

Bad Bunny Celebrated America

Feb 9·1 min read·4 words

The Super Bowl Could Not Compete With Tape-Delayed Olympic Curling

Feb 9·1 min read·10 words

Shitty Washington Post Publisher Loses Job After Skipping Out To The Super Bowl

Feb 9·1 min read·13 words

It Feels Great, Dude

Feb 9·1 min read·4 words

Artificially Large Skier Penises Should Stay Legal

Feb 9·1 min read·7 words

The Crossword, Feb. 9: Italian Class

Feb 9·1 min read·6 words

Devin The Dugong Wins The Internet With The Super Bowl AI Ad Everyone Can’t Stop Talking About

Feb 9·1 min read·17 words

What An Unbelievable Fourth Quarter From Drake Maye!

Feb 9·1 min read·8 words

Giannis Antetokounmpo Jumps In Bed With Sleazy Prediction Market

Feb 9·1 min read·9 words

Sam Darnold Is A Normal Super Bowl Champion

Feb 9·1 min read·8 words

Super Bowl LX Was The Beatdown That Will Leave No Trace

Feb 9·1 min read·11 words

James Pearce Jr. Arrested, Charged With Aggravated Battery, Stalking

Feb 8·1 min read·9 words

The Sacramento Kings Are Dedicated To Dignified Losing

Feb 8·1 min read·8 words

Luck Finally Failed Lindsey Vonn

Feb 8·1 min read·5 words

A Message From Dan McQuade’s Mom

Feb 6·1 min read·6 words

Now That Jose Alvarado’s On The Knicks, Let’s Remember Him As A Queens High School Star

Feb 6·1 min read·16 words

What Time Does “What Time Does The Super Bowl Start?” Start?

Feb 6·1 min read·11 words

The Westminster Dog Show’s Youngest Handlers Don’t Know If They Want To Do This Forever

Feb 6·1 min read·15 words

‘Suburban Fury’ Is Strange, Blinkered, And Very Compelling

Feb 6·1 min read·8 words

This Week In Delicious Scams; Or, I Yam Not What You Think I Yam

Feb 6·1 min read·14 words

Max B Is New York Rap’s Best Hope

Feb 6·1 min read·8 words

I Watched The “Lost” Live-Action ‘Dilbert’ Pilot Episode, And It’s Clear Why It Didn’t Get Picked Up

Feb 6·1 min read·17 words

My Life Among The 33 Pomeranians (And A Few Thousand Other Dogs)

Feb 5·1 min read·12 words

People Of America, It Is Cocktail Hour

Feb 5·1 min read·7 words

The Last Mayor Of Philadelphia

Feb 5·1 min read·5 words

What We Loved About Dan McQuade

Feb 5·1 min read·6 words

The Secrets Of Human And Canine Fashion At The Westminster Dog Show

Feb 4·1 min read·12 words

The Washington Post Lays Off A Third Of Its Workforce, Is Dead

Feb 4·1 min read·12 words

A Pure Tennis Boy

Feb 4·1 min read·4 words

I Thoroughly Enjoyed Watching Michael Rapaport Eat Shit On ‘The Traitors’

Feb 4·1 min read·11 words