I’m So Sad You Didn’t Think You Could Tell Your Father And Me You Were The Santa Fe Slasher

Listen, sweetie. There’s something your father and I wanted to talk to you about. Over the past few months, we’ve noticed you’ve been behaving a little differently. Your grades have slipped, you always seem a little distracted, and, yes, we’ve noticed you sneaking out late every night. But we’re not angry. If anything, we’re just […] The post I’m So Sad You Didn’t Think You Could Tell Your Father And Me You Were The Santa Fe Slasher appeared first on The Onion.