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  "path": "/ron-green/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-06-03T13:00:00.000Z",
  "site": "https://theonion.com",
  "tags": [
    "Obituaries",
    "Former Print Exclusive",
    "Vol 62: Issue 10",
    "Ron Green",
    "The Onion"
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  "textContent": "Scientists officially know 0.0000000000000000001% of what’s on the ocean floor now that Ron Green, 36, drowned in one.\n\nThe post Ron Green appeared first on The Onion.",
  "title": "Ron Green"
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