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  "path": "/rfk-jr-rushed-to-gym-after-heart-attack/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-05-22T17:34:21.000Z",
  "site": "https://theonion.com",
  "tags": [
    "Politics",
    "Health + Wellness",
    "Healthcare",
    "RFK Jr",
    "Vol 62: Issue 20",
    "RFK Jr. Rushed To Gym After Heart Attack",
    "The Onion"
  ],
  "textContent": "WASHINGTON—In a dire health emergency that forced staffers to quickly mobilize to save the Cabinet member’s life, Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. was reportedly rushed to the gym Friday after suffering a sudden heart attack. “Quick, get him on an elliptical, now! He’s fading!” said HHS staffer Kathy Guiles, attempting to hook the secretary […]\n\nThe post RFK Jr. Rushed To Gym After Heart Attack appeared first on The Onion.",
  "title": "RFK Jr. Rushed To Gym After Heart Attack"
}