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  "path": "/student-council-treasurers-deepest-convictions-tested-by-access-to-52-in-singles/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-05-21T17:50:40.000Z",
  "site": "https://theonion.com",
  "tags": [
    "Local",
    "Money",
    "School",
    "Vol 62: Issue 20",
    "Student Council Treasurer’s Deepest Convictions Tested By Access To $52 In Singles",
    "The Onion"
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  "textContent": "SUN PRAIRIE, WI—Struggling feebly against the temptation to abandon the ethical standards he swore to uphold upon his election to the position, local student council treasurer Grayson Burner’s deepest convictions were reportedly tested Thursday after he obtained access to $52 in singles. “Let’s not do anything too hasty—this kind of money doesn’t come along every […]\n\nThe post Student Council Treasurer’s Deepest Convictions Tested By Access To $52 In Singles appeared first on The Onion.",
  "title": "Student Council Treasurer’s Deepest Convictions Tested By Access To $52 In Singles"
}