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  "publishedAt": "2026-05-14T13:00:00.000Z",
  "site": "https://theonion.com",
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  "textContent": "Tara Knox and Sean Blackwell: The civil union brings Blackwell’s lifetime dating record to 3-14-1.\n\nThe post Tara Knox and Sean Blackwell appeared first on The Onion.",
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