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  "path": "/epidemiologists-confirm-first-airborne-transmission-of-mar-a-lago-face-2/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-05-05T13:00:00.000Z",
  "site": "https://theonion.com",
  "tags": [
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    "Health + Wellness",
    "Vol 62: Issue 6",
    "Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face",
    "The Onion"
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  "textContent": "WASHINGTON—In a troubling discovery that has public health researchers on high alert for a wider outbreak, a team of Georgetown University epidemiologists announced Tuesday that they had confirmed the first known airborne transmission of Mar-a-Lago face. “After a 32-year-old woman with no history of plastic surgery presented to doctors with distended lips, eyelid discoloration, and severe […]\n\nThe post Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face appeared first on The Onion.",
  "title": "Epidemiologists Confirm First Airborne Transmission Of Mar-A-Lago Face"
}