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  "path": "/2026/05/12/in-spite-of-novelty-sign-god-declines-to-bless-this-mess-satire/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-05-12T17:24:39.000Z",
  "site": "https://dissentwatch.com",
  "tags": [
    "#Column1"
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  "textContent": "TAMPA, FL — Heavenly sources have announced that the Almighty has declined to “Bless This Mess” in spite of the presence of a novelty sign requesting that He do so.",
  "title": "In Spite Of Novelty Sign, God Declines To Bless This Mess (Satire)"
}