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"path": "/2026/03/02/soon-whispers-dad-to-dormant-lawnmower-in-garage-satire/",
"publishedAt": "2026-03-02T21:57:38.000Z",
"site": "https://dissentwatch.com",
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"textContent": "LEE’S SUMMIT, MO — The dreams of spring were in the air during last weekend, as one local suburban dad gently consoled himself next to his dormant lawnmower in the garage.",
"title": "‘Soon…,’ Whispers Dad To Dormant Lawnmower In Garage (Satire)"
}