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  "publishedAt": "2026-05-11T09:30:00.000Z",
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  "textContent": "|  [link] [2 comments]\n---|---",
  "title": "FA: Rich, entitled ass-haole chucks rock at Hawaiian monk seal. FO: gets the shiat kicked out of him by locals; video of the beating goes viral; Hawaiian State politicos collectively shrug and offer to buy the locals a beer. Another day in paradise [Amusing]"
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