Dan (Fire Tower Session)

I'm still working through Noah Kahan's new album, The Great Divide. Maybe I'll write a track-by-track review someday. But the last song on the album, 'Dan', is one of my favourites so far. > Everybody’s asleep, let’s talk about him > Let’s talk about high school, talk about death > Talk about the long ride home from the grave When I first heard the song, I was instantly transported back to my first year out of high school when we got the news that a good friend of mine, also named Chris, passed away suddenly. We didn't know he'd had a heart issue his whole life and one day he just didn't wake up. I haven't thought about Chris in years. > Through the dying light of a flashlight lens > You tried to tell me how unfair it is > That I have what I have and you got what you got > Said I’d give it all back if I could, I cannot > Loon calls pierce through the violent sky > Think I stood right here back when Carlo died > Said I hated the way I made it all about me > And every day from back then is like a bad old dream Oooof. High school aged kids without any tools in their mental health toolbox arguing about how we were processing his death. Not able to recognize in the moment how this was a massive timestamp in our lives of before / after as we were all forced to confront our mortality. And how some of us had to grow up in a hurry. Faster than we might have liked to. The song is actually about hope and enjoying the moments you do have, which the chorus pulls you back to if you've forgotten while you're down in the sads of some of the verses: > I’m with my best friend Dan now > Camping on the county line > Hand around a Miller Lite > Waiting for the sun to rise > Couple of hometown heroes > Fighting over politics > Sitting and remembering > Young men from different sides > And we’re so alone > Most of the time > Most of the time, we don’t have anyone > Where do we go, when we die > I wouldn’t mind right here > No, I wouldn’t mind at all Have you ever had a best friend? Do you now? It feels like a very high school (and younger) concept, but when I hear Noah Kahan singing about it I wonder about the alternate timeline and where Chris would've been in my life if he hadn't passed away. He played drums with energy and joy that you wouldn't have guessed someone with a heart issue would have. He also loved to go water skiing and was super generous with his parent's boat (or his parent's gas money?), and loved helping people learn how to waterski. Maybe life would've gotten him down and beaten that joy out of him? Maybe he would've dropped the sticks in pursuit of a career and family? Would we still be friends? > Said I hated the way I made it all about me There's a beautiful version of "Dan" Noah Kahan recorded with his band around a fire pit that's as good or better than the album version. I'd pay good money to be able to sit around listening to songs like that. Direct link to the video