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  "description": "RACHEL CORDASCO",
  "path": "/restless-reality/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-06-27T16:00:16.000Z",
  "site": "https://qb.foofaraw.press",
  "textContent": "Welcome to Restless Reality!\n\nWe’re so glad you’re staying with us (even if the razor-winged magpies say otherwise; don’t listen to them). As a world-class Alternative Hotel of the Unexpected, we’re brimming with caffeinated carpeting, shapeshifting smorgasbords, boundless beds, savory showers, hand-eating heat pipes, and so much more. Hungry after your travels? Grab a sub from the common area (by  _grab_ , we mean _you need to actually grab it because it might skitter away on its hundred legs_ , and by  _sub_ we could mean  _a sandwich_ or _a literal submarine_ , and by  _common area_ , we mean either _the space where you might find sofas and chairs_ or  _the giant warm-blooded womb of a ginglegormer_). Tired from running the grapefruit gauntlet while just trying to enter the hotel? Take a snooze on your comfortable bed (it might be a rectangular structure with a mattress, blankets, and pillows  _or_ it might be the maw of a recently-resurrected and fiendishly-hungry dilophosaurus named “Bed.” Good luck!). You’ve come here to be surprised, yes? Wonder at how quickly our lamps morph into Lamborghinis, marvel at how our waiters shift into ‘gators, and delight in how quickly our tables transform into tribbles. You never know what’s going to happen 45from moment to moment, but that’s why you’re paying us the big credits, right?!\n\nAnd remember, getting eaten, liquified, dessicated, dematerialized, or chopped up into a million tiny pieces _does not_ qualify you for a refund. Enjoy your stay!\n\n* * *\n\nRachel Cordasco is a Wisconsin -based independent scholar and writer.",
  "title": "Restless Reality",
  "updatedAt": "2026-06-27T18:00:16.574Z"
}