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  "description": "MIKE RANGE",
  "path": "/what-would-your-mother-say/",
  "publishedAt": "2026-04-04T16:00:25.000Z",
  "site": "https://qb.foofaraw.press",
  "textContent": "I swipe my hand across my plate, collecting bread crumbs. I greedily lick my fingers, drawing a pop from each as they leave my mouth.\n\nAcross the table, William’s eyes are wide.\n\n“Oh, so sorry, Miss Manners. Does eating with my hands make me a Neanderthal?”\n\nDefiantly, I grab the entree with my bare hands. “But I’m not the only one with dining etiquette issues, am I?” Twisting, I rend apart the bones of the roast.\n\n“Let’s not forget—until very recently, you would put your elbows on the table.” I chuckle, pointing an ulna at what is left of him.\n\n* * *\n\n__What would your Mother say?__ by Mike Range won the Crumby Editors Choice Award in our first ever Crumbs drabble contest.",
  "title": "What would your Mother say?",
  "updatedAt": "2026-04-04T18:00:25.935Z"
}