I can’t afford to go skiing and it’s holding my social life back

This week we hear from a reader struggling with a wealth gap (Picture: Getty Images)

Lottie, a 29-year-old from Walthamstow, is the lowest earner in her friendship group — and it’s starting to impact her social life.

While the graduate is comfortable enough to enjoy the odd meal out, she can’t keep up with her university pals, who’ve all gone into high-salary City jobs.

In this week’s Money Problem, Metro’s consumer champion Sarah Davidson offers some practical advice for dealing with a growing financial gulf in your group.

The problem:

I know this is going to sound like a moan but I feel like I’m being left behind by all my friends and it’s because of money. I graduated from university seven years ago and moved to London like most of my friends. At first, it was great. We were all in our first jobs and renting in house shares. We went out for dinners and nights out together and we all wanted to go to the same places.

But things have really changed in the last couple of years. Three of my closest friends work in banking and finance and my other two best mates’ other halves work in finance too. The fact is, they’re earning over £100,000 now – to be honest, it’s probably a lot more. They want to meet at ridiculously expensive restaurants and blow hundreds of pounds on drinks after.

We all used to go on holidays together, usually Greece or Spain. We still want to do that but this year, they’ve all decided our group holiday should be skiing. They want to get a 12-person chalet in Méribel in France for £30,000 for a week in March. Flights are about £200. Then there’s all the gear I’d need to get which is minimum £250, the ski pass is another £650 and ski hire is £250 and meals out and clubbing. There is just no way I can afford my share. They’re all sympathetic but have said this is the holiday they’re doing and I can come or not. I feel like this is so unfair but I don’t know what to do about it?

POLL

Poll

Do you think Lottie's friends are being unfair?

• No, they should enjoy their salariesCheck

• Yes, they should choose a cheaper holidayCheck

Sarah’s answer…

Oooof. Almost £5,000 for a week on the slopes. How the other half lives. Let’s separate some stuff out here as there’s more than one gripe you’ve got. As I see it, there are three problems.

One, your friends earn far more than you and they want to enjoy it – with or without you. Two, you want to go on holiday with them and that means Méribel. Three, you feel these two problems aren’t fair.

Let’s take them in turn.

Growing up, having careers, families, moving house – these things are a fact of life and they take people in different directions.

You’re experiencing that and it’s not a lot of fun when your friends’ lives all seem to go in one direction while yours takes another path.

Sadly, you’re not going to solve this problem unless you get a job with a salary in the same league – or you win the lottery.

Lottie needs a lottery win (Picture: Getty Images/Maskot)

This leaves you with two options – accept that the nature of your friendships has changed and find ways to do things together that don’t cost a fortune. Or, accept that their lives and yours aren’t going at the same speed – at the moment.

Good friends stay the course but often they come in and out of our lives at different times. Just because your friends are prioritising spending money over spending time with you now doesn’t mean they always will.

Second problem – you want to go to Méribel.

Uh, Lottie, I hate to break it to you but you’re not going to Méribel – at least not on quite the same holiday as your friends.

This said, you could go to Méribel on a much smaller budget. You’ll have to compromise on some things though.

If you go for a shared studio apartment in nearby Brides-les-Bains, accommodation should come in around £450 for a week in March.

Budget flights from London to Geneva can be found for less than £100.

Ski gear can be bought cheaply – even new. A basic ski jacket from Decathlon is £40, trousers £20, goggles £18 etc. You could also head to Vinted, Depop or similar sites to buy second hand.

You can see a breakdown in the table below.

For food, if you stick to supermarkets and go booze-free it’s possible to do the week on £100 – though I appreciate that sort of defeats the point of being on holiday with your friends.

Sarah's estimate for skiing on a budget

Item Cost

Flights £75

Transfers £85

Accommodation £450

Lift pass £350

Ski hire £85

Clothing £153

Food £100

Insurance £25

TOTAL £1,323

Third problem – it’s not fair.

No Lottie, it’s completely fair. It sounds as though all of you were at the same uni and got the same quality of education.

You chose a career that doesn’t pay the big bucks and that means a lifestyle that doesn’t include £30,000 chalets.

Sarah answers more of your money problems

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