2026-04-03

Being introspective is fucking exhausting. I was angry at a friend but while I was processing this anger more than half of my brain is asking “well did you expect too much? did you communicate your preference enough? is this anger justified? what’s preventing you from regulating this feeling? anger isn’t really productive is it? you are capable of indifference as to not harsh the vibes, so why not do that? anger isn’t productive.” Then at the same time became angry with myself, for not letting me just feel the anger, for prioritizing the examination of my feelings over feeling. But I do hate being angry. I do think it’s counterproductive. Indifference is a lot more productive. Indifference leads to resolution and relief. :/ Need to talk to my therapist. Like (Backed by OpenHeart protocol)