Jesus Clarifies Return Will Be Strictly Limited To Carpentry Business

JERUSALEM—In an effort to soften the blow for a human race eagerly awaiting His glorious arrival, Jesus Christ, the Son of God, clarified Monday that His return would be strictly limited to His carpentry business. “While I will soon appear once more upon the earthly realm, My sole focus during this Second Coming will be […] The post Jesus Clarifies Return Will Be Strictly Limited To Carpentry Business appeared first on The Onion.